Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during exams were quite humorous......

A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) before or after their colonoscopies:


1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!
 
2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'
 
3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'
 
4. 'Are we there yet?  Are we there yet?  Are we there yet?'
 
5. 'You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married.'
 
6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'
 
7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'
 
8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'
 
9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'
 
10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'
 
12. 'How far up did you go?   I now have a sore throat.'
 
       And the best one of all..
 
13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up  here.