Current Location : http://www.stupidemailjokes.com/Jokes/GivingUpWine.aspx
(Sign In | Register)

StupidEmailJokes.com

Why forward your email jokes to a few when you can share with everyone?


Recently Added:

Golfing Truths More Bad Puns Serious Questions to Ponder Larry the cable guy adages Like this one? Oxymoron Fun Great Blonde Joke And then the fight started You Are HIRED One Liners Inner Peace Times Up Work Alert Bad Economy Things Mother Taught Us Universal Laws Easter Bunny Accident Legal System at its Best Life in the 1500s Men are just Happier People APHORISM Conversion Tables Retirement No Joke Vocabulary Lesson Midwest Living 5 Lessons Importance of Walking Medical Test Flat Tire Word Puzzle Boomer Music Cold Minnesota Bus Gas Tech 4 Country Folks Blond Washington Disturbed Carols Healthy Insanity Kentucky Cut Dog Peeves Under 30 Best Blonde Joke Kool Kats Kuiz 53 Years Ago COLONOSCOPIES Extreme Redneck The Mustard Story HAPPY HALLOWEEN Bride Groom Broom Smart Answers Cna yuo raed tihs Age Calculator Ambiguities Dysfunctional Cards Halloween Story Women Drivers New Stock Market Terms Test Your Memory Ponderisms Signs of Menopause Bubba the Greeter Old is When Snow Shovelers Diary How to Clean the Toilet My Needs Never Too Old Lucky Frog New Husband Store 29 Smile Lines Confucius Says Important Message Top 10 Puns Puns Aplenty Grammar Lesson Giving Up Wine Life Explained Boots or Hats
Giving Up Wine

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'

'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.

'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

'Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.

'Are you NUTS !' replied the homeless woman. ' I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'

'Well,' I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'

The homeless Woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'

I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'